What do you like the most about black people?

Black people tip unevenly, despite the stereotype of them not tipping. Some over tip. Some don’t tip at all. Some do it the same as every other race/people - they shrug and throw a dollar in the jar. It is true they don’t tip as well as White people but they do tip - and often well. And one thing is true of all races - they drunker they get the better they tip.

Black women have a push-pull with parties. They tend to overdress but many of the women bought their expensive gown five years ago and put on 50 pounds and still squeeze into it. I think they think they still look good. They don’t. More than any other race, Black women have no problem exposing nipples at fancy parties as style. Men where tuxedoes with sneakers and backward hats. White people wear suits and clothes like it’s rare to dress up. Hispanic people are interested in flamboyant displays of clothing and bodies.

At white people parties, such as graduations, the parents get shitfaced and the kids, who never try to sneak booze from the bar, are embarrassed and have to drive them home. White people by and large tips the best.

What transforms the philosophical intellect?

I am a bartender and so I do a lot of functions. I see all kinds of people - asian, black, latin, white. All have their characteristics. White people drink “Bud Lite”. Hispanic people want Cas Amigos or Don Julio tequila. Black people want Hennessy and Red Bull. These patterns are so common that we keep rows of Hennessy and Don Julio and Patron. No one ever wants Cuervo even though it’s half the price. No one drinks whiskey anymore even though we have an entire shelf of nothing but various whiskeys and bourbon. The only exception is Jack Daniels. The whiskey is covered with dust, literally.

I see the good and bad of all races at these ridiculous functions - baby showere, engagement parties, 15 year birthdays for Spanish girls where they are dressed up like a princess with a crown and long white gloves. You see lots of things.

I can say this: every race has beautiful people, beautiful women. But no one - and I mean no one - has beautiful women like some of the Black women I have seen at these functions. The thing I like most about Black people is the stunning black women of all ages who know style, poise and how their looks affect men. I am an old, fat, bald, white bartender wearing a VFW shirt…. and they will flirt and bat eyes at me as if I am desirable. And they never get free drinks from me, though they might get better service. The parties with Black people are the only ones where I find lace or other kinds of panties on the floor under the tables after the party. I can’t even understand why.

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So these are my racist observations from running functions for seven years. Take from it what you will.

But that is one thing I don’t like about Black people - they are almost always ready to fight for any or no reason. And that gets much worse as they get drunker. They don’t even care if they are wearing an expensive suit. They will thrown down right there. And as a White guy I can say this without any hestitation - they like the suckiest, raunchiest music at the highest volume. Last night I listened to a song at a baby shower where there were lots of children where the chorus - at full volume - was “fuck her in the ass, fuck her in the ass, fuck her in the ass.” I had to put down the drink I was making and blanch in shame for the women and children - and no one missed a beat. It meant nothing to them. After the party is over, my ears are ringing from that terrible music. Some of the other bartenders refuse to work those functions just because of the music and volume. I know - I am old and out of touch.